A Collection of Vintage Celebrity Endorsements

We're accustomed to celebrity athletes endorsing products related to their areas of expertise (think Michael Jordan and Nikes), but it's hard to imaging why anyone would care about Mohammad Ali's opinion on roach killing or Doris Day's opinion on construction equipment:

Sammy Davis, Jr. was notorious for his drinking, so this one kinda makes sense:

Lucille Ball apparently had a couple of vices we didn't know about:

Humphrey Bogart selling Whitman's Samplers:

Here's Jerry Lewis with Colonel Sanders:

Boris Karloff:

Sonny and Cher, because when you think of Cher you think Bible, right?

Here's Pope Leo XIII around the torn of the 20th century endorsing Vin Mariani, a wine and cocaine cocktail:

Mr. Spock (Leonard Nimoy) from Star Trek:

Roy Rogers:

Bob Hope:

And, in the future president category, Ronald Reagan:

And The Donald, although since he's selling his own products, I guess this doesn't really count:

Lots more here.

Infographic: Spring Cleaning Checklist (also, Best Ways to Die)

From Obvious Plant, Jeff Wysaski's ongoing project to create funny but fake signs - the first two are for an online-only audience, but he leaves some (see below) in public places to confuse and amuse people. If you think this is a great idea but don't have the skill (or imagination) to do it yourself, he's published a book of posters for you to hang around your neighborhood: High Five This Sign: Prank Posters to Post on Poles.

In this case, he switched the toilet troubleshooting guide at a Home Depot hardware store with an "updated" version:

Here he left some updated candy slogans at the grocery store:

Lots more at ObviousPlant.com, and Wysaski also posts at PleatedJeans.com.

Friday links

Uninspirational Quotes for People Who Hate Inspirational Quotes.

Flying Water Taxis are coming to Paris this Summer.

Found: A Colossal Statue of Ramses II Hiding Under a Cairo Street.

Dead Men’s Teeth: A History of Dentures.

Humanure: The Next Frontier In Composting.

Barns Are Painted Red Because of the Physics of Dying Stars.

ICYMI, Wednesday's links are here, and include the secret plan for the days after the Queen’s death, William Shatner's birthday, why we don't (generally) eat horses, the science of facial hair, and how far back in time you could go and still understand English.

Extremely Cool Slinky Tricks

Huang Zhenghuai, a Taiwanese native, is quite extraordinary with his classic Slinky.

WARNING: KILL THE SOUND!!! It's absolutely atrocious.

Related: Fascinating Facts About the Invention of the Slinky.

Here’s Gollum Singing “Time After Time” Because Why The Heck Not

Youtuber Ijameswalters seems to specialize in classic songs sung in a Gollum voice, which he does very well. Per Nerdist:

You’d think a centuries-old Stoorish hobbit would lose his ear for harmony after being twisted and corrupted by the One Ring Of Power, but you’d be wrong. Guess being stuck in a cave talking to yourself is a wonderful way to keep your vocal pipes in good health.

Thanks, Laurie!

Wednesday links

How Far Back In Time Could You Go And Still Understand English?

A History of Tug-of-War Fatalities.

The Science of Facial Hair: What Signals Do Beards, Stubble, and Mustaches Send to Others?

It's William Shatner's birthday: here he is in 1978 'singing' Rocket Man, plus a Star Trek/Monty Python mashup.

'London Bridge is down': the secret plan for the days after the Queen’s death.

Why We Have Such Complicated Feelings About Eating Horses.

ICYMI, Monday's links are here, and include silent film-era movie effects, vintage armored cars, blowing up a watermelon with 20,000 volts of electricity, and the first day of Spring.

Uninspirational Quotes for People Who Hate Inspirational Quotes

There are a LOT of these de-motivational quotes on the intertubes - I've picked a few that are safe for work below but if you want more (some of which may have NSFW language), look here.

How Far Back In Time Could You Go And Still Understand English?

The English language has changed over time - if you had a time machine, how far back could you go and still understand English? At what point in history would you not be able to understand?

YouTube:

If you went back in time to the 1800's and 1700's, you'd probably still be okay. This except is from the book 'Robinson Crusoe', in 1719:

"I, poor miserable Robinson Crusoe, 

being shipwrecked during a dreadful storm in the offing, 

came on shore on this dismal, unfortunate island, 

which I called “The Island of Despair”

That's fairly easy to understand, but you might struggle with old slang words like 'batty fang' and 'kickerapoo'.

batty fang - a beating

kickerapoo - dead

land pirates - highway robbers

gutfoundered - very hungry

whapper - a big lie

Nitsqueeger - Hairdresser

Xantippe - an ill tempered wife

Abbess - a nun

Thornback - a spinster

Barber-monger - a vain man

Bleater - someone who complains a lot

Brabble - to quarrel loudly

Crapulous - the feeling of being too full

Hugger-mugger - secretly

Lettice-cap - a medical device like a hair net

Pigarlik - a bald head

Petty fogger - a dodgy lawyer

Mumpsimus - the act of sticking to old mistaken beliefs about language and customs simply out of habit

The 1600s is the time of Shakespeare. 

"Thy natural magic and dire property,

On wholesome life usurp immediately."

Here, Lucianus talking about the natural magic of poison. and how using it to kill the king will usurp the throne.

Trickier to follow, but not everyone spoke like that. You would hear lots of words you didn't understand though.

The bigger problem for you now is the pronunciation. The sound of the vowels has changed, and the accent is becoming much harder to understand. 

For example, "tea" is pronounced "tay", and "gone" is pronounced "goan".

In the 1500s people essentially speak like the Bible. 

"Now therefore thus saith the Lord, 

Thou shalt not come down 

from that bed on which thou 

art gone up, but shalt surely die."

KJV 2 Kings 1:4

There are also hundreds of words that don't mean a thing to you. 

Before about 1400 AD, you'd hear Middle English, and you would hardly understand anything, written or spoken. 

"Whan that Aprill, with his shoures soote

The droghte of March hath perced to the roote

And bathed every veyne in swich licour,

Of which vertu engendred is the flour;"

The Canterbury Tales, 1389

If you went all the way back to one 1000 AD, you'd hear Old English:

Lord's Prayer

Fæder ure þu þe eart on heofonum;

Si þin nama gehalgod

to becume þin rice

gewurþe ðin willa

on eorðan swa swa 

on heofonum.

Good luck explaining that you need 'one point twenty-one Jigawatts' to get home!

h/t PreSurfer

Monday links

Spring is here - The vernal equinox is on March 20th at 6:29 a.m. EDT. Here's Vivaldi, science, myths, "spring spheres" and more.

How Movie Effects Were Done in the Silent Film Era.

Into the woods: how one man survived alone in the wilderness for 27 years.

Blowing up a watermelon with 20,000 volts of electricity, in slow motion.

17 ridiculous 'smart' gadgets that really exist.

A gallery of vintage armored cars.

ICYMI, Friday's links are here, and include a map of New York’s earliest skyscrapers, dozens of nuclear test videos that have been declassified and uploaded to YouTube, forged art that fooled the Metropolitan Museum for decades, and lots of information on Saint Patrick. 

Watch this guy climb a 1500 foot tall TV tower to change a lightbulb

YouTube has a drone video:

Somebody has to change out that lightbulb at the top of those tall TV towers!

This is tower climber Kevin Schmidt making the climb to the very top of the now inactive KDLT TV analog broadcast antenna near Salem, SD.

It was a beautiful fall day for a climb and the views are stunning! I would suggest watching at 1080 HD in full screen to get a small taste of the experience.