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Sunday, December 7, 2014

Monty Python's Reenactment of the Battle of Pearl Harbor

Specializing in Historical Drama, the women of the Batley Townswomens' Guild aren't afraid to get their hands dirty when it comes to promoting their craft.

The script:

Canning: (Graham Chapman) The stuff of history is indeed woven in the woof. Pearl Harbour. There are pages in history's book which are written on the grand scale. Events so momentous that they dwarf man and time alike. And such is the Battle of Pearl Harbour, re-enacted for us now by the women of Barley Townswomen's Guild.

(Cut to a muddy corner of a field. Miss Rita Fairbanks stands talking straight to camera. Behind her lurk five more pepperpots.)

Canning: (voice over) Miss Rita Fairbanks - you organized this reconstruction of the Battle of Pearl Harbour - why?

Rita: (Eric Idle) Well we've always been extremely interested in modern drama ... we were of course the first Townswomen's Guild to perform 'Camp On Blood Island', and last year we did our extremely popular re-enactment of 'Nazi War Atrocities'. So this year we thought we would like to do something in a lighter vein...

Canning: So you chose the Battle of Pearl Harbour?

Rita: Yes, that's right, we did.

Canning: Well I can see you're all ready to go. So I'll just wish you good luck in your latest venture.

Rita: Thank you very much, young man.

(She retreats, and joins the other ladies who meanwhile separate into two opposing sides facing each other.)

Canning: (reverential voice over) Ladies and gentlemen, the World of History is proud to present the premiere of the Batley Townswomen's Guild's re-enactment of 'The Battle of Pearl Harbour'.

(A whistle blows and the two sides set about each other with handbags etc., speeded up 50% just to give it a bit of edge. Cut to Canning in studio.)

Canning: The Battle of Pearl Harbour. 

Kind of related, in the sense that it's a British leader doing Monty Python and the Brits were also in WWII, here's the story of Monty Python's 'Dead Parrot Sketch', with bonus Maggie Thatcher (wiki) saying the lines:

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