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Friday, June 22, 2018

Want your vagina steam-cleaned but don't have a spa nearby? Here are the do-it-yourself instructions.

via Vice:
Vaginal steaming, sometimes called V-steaming by those too squeamish to say the word "vagina," is remarkably similar to making tea. You put a bunch of special herbs in hot water, then—and this is where the tea similarity ends—hover over it, allowing the steam to "deep-clean" your vagina and uterus. This is said to dislodge any "buildup" and can allegedly relieve hormonal imbalances, menstrual discomfort, and digestive issues.
Right. Well, doesn't sound like something I'd be willing to either pay for or do in public (or maybe not at all, really), but if you want to try it, here are do-it-yourself instructions from the ​YinOva Center:

Pour eight cups of water (preferably purified water) into a medium-size pot.
Place a handful of fresh herbs (about a quarter cup) into the water.

Bring water to a soft boil (with the lid on) for five minutes.

Turn off the heat and steep for another five minutes with the lid on.

Pour four cups (half of the pot) of water into a bowl you've placed in your toilet.

Wave your hand eight to ten inches over the herbal water to make sure it's not too hot.

Remove your underwear and sit on the seat above the steaming water.

Drape a large blanket or sheet around your waist and down to the floor to make sure no steam escapes.

Keep yourself warm by wearing something on your feet (socks, slippers) and neck. You do not want any cold to get into your body while you are trying to warm it.

You should feel a warm, rolling heat for about ten to 12 minutes.

When the steam dies down, dump the water into the toilet. Starting with step four, begin the second dosage with the other half of the herbal water. If it has cooled too much you'll need to reheat it, but test again before sitting over the steam.
If you get your V-steam done at a spa, they'll seat you in chair with a little hole in the middle, which allows the steam to rise into your hoo-ha (see the photo above). Since I do not own a chair with a hole in the middle, I was pleased to find that the YinOva Center recommended steaming on your toilet - you just put a bowl full of steaming herbs in there and have a seat, and it's a handy place to dump the bowl when you're done.

Vaginal steam baths come from an ancient Korean tradition called chai-yok, which uses mugwort and wormwood to cleanse the vagina. Good luck finding those at Walgreens. I'd be tempted to use some herbal tea, but per the author at Vice, the mugwort package claimed that it could "increase or develop psychic powers". That sounds kind of cool, although I keep trying to imagine how vaginal psychic powers would manifest.

Anyway, there's more at Vice and YinOva if you're interested. If you end up doing this, please leave a note in the comments and let me know how it went!

1 comment:

  1. ... About that slow-cooker that is placed beneath the uh, "special chair" in the photo above. Also, the alternate instructions to put water "... into a bowl you've placed on your toilet." Good justifications for why I'm not a fan of pot-luck suppers.